Saturday, May 28, 2011

Being Single- Just Thinking Aloud Pt1

I'm starting to understand why I don't have a man. I'm 25 with a 4yr old son, and contrary to popular belief those are NOT the reasons I am single and keep running into the men I do. Having a conversation with ma sis @Pink_Choclat and reflecting on my past and very present present..lol.. its ME that keeps these circles of catostrophy afloat. No its not how I dress or carry myself.. b/c that to me is mythical.. its my mindset. You can be the life of the party or the teacher of a pre-k class... every woman has a "freak" in her or a wildside.. given the right mixes of alcohol ;o) Some women are confident enough to showcase their sexy figure and bright red hot lips in a night club and well others are not. That's isn't a judge of character to me. Just like men like to drive fast cars.. Maseratis and Porches.. doesn't mean because he drives those fast cars that he is unsafe or a "flight risk". So NO dress how U FEEL at that moment and act in a way no one can FEEL but you no matter where u are! Never be scared to be YOU! (Except at the White House O_o Lol) that should not stop you from gaining the RIGHT man or woman designed for you... those stereotypical sayings with the long skirts and turtle necks showin no skin but your face SLAY ME! A man will respect u if YOU respect yourself period. No matter how u "look" out... Now I'm not encouraging you to walk around naked! No no no! That's def not the case.. but I don't think a woman should lessen her natural sex appeal to gain a "good man". All men have potential to be a good man.. just takes a good woman.. All women have potential to be a good woman... just takes a good man... Well this is just my opinion.

Anywho back to the topic of discussion... being single lol. And why? I jus feel as if I don't believe in myself a lot when a ok or good man is standing right in front of me... psychologically I question me.. which makes me question him and all of the motives he has out for me that's not even there... from money to sex.. to being played.. lied too defeated morally... idk just everything my little insecure brain let's me think of... lol.. which scares him off inadvertently because my actions have now change.. along with my mindset. And who the hell wants to deal with that...??  Now I'm checking Twitter checking Facebook checking Tumblr checking blogspots tryna fig out WHAT'S WRONG with this man... or tryna fig out WHAT I'M UP AGAINST? And that's where the problem starts.. I'm already worrying about what's happened to "us" before anything has happened to us? Crazy right? But see.. I KNOW I'm a good person with a kind heart.. I can be an excellent woman to my man... I know I have all the proper credentials of keeping a home.. but why can't I make it that far? WORRIATION OF FAILURE! I shoot myself down before things even get off the ground. I reeaalllyyy have to work on that. A lot of women do. Pride held or not. We do. That's why there's so many happy "sidepieces" and miserables "mains".. those mains started worrying about the next bitch... and the next bitch has no cares or worries in the world except for YOUR man... something you USE to do...

Ima take a brain break.... Ill be back! Follow my blogspot tho! Love MoNa ;o)

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